A sign

A twist in the order
a sign in the skies
something that could
guide my mind
a small hint
from above
to help in this line
to make all fine
be happy, joyful
at last.

Smile

I want to smile
not think at all
even if it is vile
smile!
feel as touched
by a god.
joyful at full
no rightful thought
no reasoning involve
smile and laugh
as life is new
no worries or woes
just laughter
just love.

To a toy

The life of a toy is long

change of hands

to live more

I came willing to play

And got lost in the game

Nothing gives me more joy

That my puppet’s locks

Undress it and change its clothes

Talk as only can with a toy

The time ran out

Judging eyes reproach

My childish ways

No longer proper for my age

Trying hard to leave the child behind

But the infant refuses be left aside

Forced upon me years to be

The grown woman I must be

Think selfish of me

Trying to keep my beloved toy

When someone more

Could play without remorse

Perhaps another mistress

Will achieve turn

those wooden limbs

in flesh and bones

give my puppet a voice.

When we two parted

Today a touched rock bottom by choking with chocolate while looking for paper to sketch, I ran out of it. After drinking lots of water felt good enough but not to draw but to read some poetry. Lord Byron moved me with his poem "when we two parted" but I was in tears when I finished "definition of love" by Andrew Marvell. The rhyme and beautiful selection of words is amanzing and soon I will be able to read it without a shaking voice to post it here. The drawings above were made quickly so they are not detailed at all.

"When we two parted" is a nice poem in which Lord Byron describe a sore break-up that it wouldn't be easily forgotten by one of the lovers. It portraits so many different feelings and emotions, not only the distance and sudden indifference but also the open wound when the lovers' name is mentioned. The wondering how love remains instead of fading by the indifference. Also a review on the past- In secret we met-phrase reflected on a future encounter that might be as painful as the initial farewell.

Love is a complicated feeling sometimes and it certainly takes time to make peace with the past. If Lord Byron wrote this as a reflection of his own feelings, I can only say, -well done, girl(whoever you were). Certainly, he would have been over it extremely soon as the hedonist-bisexual freak he was.

Serial flirt

He sadly said
better no other guy
cross your path
other guy, I said
rather wonder
what it meant
Oh yes, he replied
some other your fancy
might favor
A serial flirt
labeled I was
fame so clear
so low in esteem
you hold my being
I bother to deny
what it's for me a lie
words can hurt
and yours cetainly have
that guy, you fear
can be easily repeated
your worries let me clear
no guy will ever be,
cross my way as he did
'cos that guy wasn't just a guy
it was the guy for me.

The land of no blame

My whole body screamed for you
every cell shouted
throw myself at your feet
just touch you
just feel you
just breath the same air again
please take me to the land of no blame
love me , love me,I begged
Or make me your slave
I'm so desperated for your touch
the sound of your voice
oh, one more time and again
I don't want to leave your side
take me to the land of no blame, I said
so i wished ,I could beg
I could say the words
I could solve all
hopeless again I found
empty handed I was
nothing to offer but blind devotion.
murmur a riddle of sorrows
combined with my woes
to leave again wishing to stay.

Adore you

I adore you in silence
in the pain of no words
in the dungeon of sins
I adore you in insanity
a way no one comprehends
a way I only can
I adore you violently
fearfully and wild
I desired with all I have
I adore you again, again
against the law,
against my god.

I'm going to Gent with a group from the art academy, hopefully will be fun to visit museums. No post tomorrow then, I'll be back quite late.